Saturday, July 27, 2013


Get Bent Blurb

Naomi Knox is missing.
I don't even f*cking know whether she's dead or alive.
What I do know is that she's the air I need to breathe.
She's my redemption, an all consuming fire that burns in my blood.
And I'll do anything to find her. Anything. Even if means the end for me.

 ♪  ♪  ♪ 

Turner Campbell is searching.
But he has no f*cking clue what it is he's searching for.
There's darkness all around and enough secrets to choke.
There are angels, and there are devils. It's impossible to tell them apart.
Light needs to be shone on the truth, but there's no one left to hold the torch. The line between life and death is blurred, and the players are all thoroughly entrenched in the game. The question is: am I still one of them?

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I tap the vein in my right arm with two fingers and check the rubber tourniquet that's wrapped around my sweaty flesh, making sure it's pulled tight.  I'm trying to set up a good injection site, so I can take the syringe I've got clutched between my teeth and shoot up.  It's the only way I'll get through this.  The only fucking way.
“Turner!  What the hell is going on in there?”  I slump against the wall and ignore Treyjan's hoarse shouting.  He's been out there all damn morning, screaming his friggin' head off.  I don't want to hear it anymore.  He's driving me nuts.
I pull the syringe out of my mouth and slide the needle into my skin, hissing at the rush of white hot pain when it punctures my vein.  I press the plunger down and wait.  A few seconds later, I feel it in the back of my throat.  It tastes like fucking victory, like accomplishment, like I'm king of the fucking world.  I yank the needle out unceremoniously and toss it into the trash can.  It lands on top of a mountain of used condoms and tissue paper, and it's probably unsanitary as shit, but I don't care.  I don't care about anything right now except Naomi.
“Turner, get your fucking ass out here now!”
I rip the tourniquet off next and lay it on the counter, clutching the sides of the sink as I lean over and cough.  Good meth always makes you cough.  And it makes you feel so fucking good that even a nightmare like this starts to look like a dream.
“Are you slamming meth in there, motherfucker?” Trey screams, and he sounds like he's about to burst a damn vein this time.  I lift my eyes up and stare at myself in the mirror.  It's not a pretty sight.  I look like shit.  Jesus Christ.  Have I been walking around like this for three days?  My eyes are bloodshot and ringed with purple, and my lips are pale and cracked.  I look like a Goddamn zombie.
“Don't get your panties in a wad, bitch,” I call out to him, standing up and sniffing, letting my eyes fall closed for another minute.  At least now I don't have to worry about how I'm going to get through another day.  The drugs will take care of that for me.
I reach over and unlock the door.
Trey doesn't waste any time opening it and throwing me a death glare.  I ignore him in favor of putting on some eyeliner.  We have a show tonight, and I want to look good.  Hell, I have to look good or I'm not getting onstage.  My pain is private, not something to hang out for all to see.  I'm not on display here.
“You got a hard-on for me or something?” I ask him, pretending that everything's alright, that my life has not just gone from bad to worse, that the breath has not just been suctioned out of my fucking lungs.  “I can't even shit in peace anymore?”  Trey looks down at the garbage, up at the tourniquet and sneers.
“You're just gonna get high everyday now?”  I shrug, applying black around my eyes, making sure it's thick enough to hide the circles.  Women love eyeliner on guys anyway.  Or at least the women at my shows do, the ones with the piercings in their noses and the tattoos on their hips.  I want to pick one of them up and fuck away the pain, but I can't do that to Naomi.  For the first time in my life, I can't even imagine screwing another woman.
I look up at the ceiling as my brain seizures with false pleasure, misplaced hope, fatal courage.
“What are you now, Mother Theresa?  We've gotten high everyday since we were sixteen.”  I pretend not to notice that Trey is wearing Travis' cap.  Or whoever's cap.  Still haven't figured that mystery out.  There seem to be a whole shit ton of them floating around right now, and that's kind of the least of my worries.
“Not like this, Turner.  Not fucking like this.  What are you doing?  You're gonna kill yourself.”  I don't tell my best friend that I don't care, that I'd rather die than live without Naomi Knox.  I mean, how fucked up is that?  Love sucks balls.  Everybody always acts like it's the one thing worth living for, that spark in the fire that pulls you in, that strokes your hair back and lets you know that everything's going to be okay.  Well now that I've fallen into it, nothing is okay.  Nothing will ever be okay.  I sipped from love's wine and now I'm drunk as shit without a place to lie down.  My happy ending, my saving grace is lying dead in a morgue, cut up and fucked up, so mangled they can't even identify her damn body for sure.  Oh, they say it's probably her because if not then, I mean, where the shit is she?  Where?  Where?  Where the fuck are you, Knox?  With your pretty blonde hair and your sunglasses and your fuck you all attitude.

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